Tuned Out Teens
Last weekend, Brian and I attended his family's annual get-together. Aunts, uncles, cousins all ranging in age from babies right on up to 70's. Only about half his family were present, but being French Canadian on both sides, we were still packed in like sardines. We had missed past years' gatherings since it's usually planned for New Years morning - truly inconvenient for us. Consequently, we hadn't seen this many family members all together in one place since our wedding 15 years ago. The aunties and uncles look a bit older, more gray in the hair, a little slower, but so happy to see all their kids together in one place. The cousins haven't aged very much - still recognizeable. Their children, the ones who were babies the last time either of us looked, were a collection of gawky teens that bore no resemblance to the chubby cheeked cherubs they once were.
As I circulated through the rooms visiting with relatives young and old and showing off my new baby girl, I noticed that the teens had all congregated in one spot - reminding me of a flock of birds that will huddle around the chimney cap for warmth on a winter day. It was so odd... They all looked as though they were in a trance, no one speaking and every one of them (there were at least a dozen) with a wire coming from his or her ear. Brian and our oldest daughter Cate (13) , were sitting on the sofa together chatting when I entered the room. I gave my husband a quizzical look which was returned by a knowing gaze. You see, our kids don't own iPods or MP3 players. In fact, until this year we didn't own a video game of any description. That's rather late in the game, I assure you. Not that I have anything against these little audio devices other than the fact that they are extremely pricey. They'd make wonderful little tools for the kids to hear audio books or lessons on while driving or sitting outside enjoying the weather.
What saddened me was that these children were missing out on so much fun. They weren't interracting at all with each other. They could have been chatting away about school, music, movies, other kids they know (most attend the same school). They could have been playing board games or having a game of football outside, the way we used to do with our cousins. What will their family reunions be like when they're grown - assuming they bother to plan one? What memories will they have to share with each other? They're so tuned out now, will they ever learn to tune in? To build deep, meaningful relationships with anyone, let alone their own family.
The appalling thing is that their parents simply shrug their shoulders and sigh "What can you do?". Indeed, you are their parents - the power is ALL yours. Go ahead and buy the gadgets for your kids, but do it with wisdom and prudence. YOU control the use. Get your kids outside, organize a game of some kind, start a conversation with them. It's a parent's responsibility. But it's so much easier to have them plug in and leave us alone to do what we want to do - uninterrupted...
As I circulated through the rooms visiting with relatives young and old and showing off my new baby girl, I noticed that the teens had all congregated in one spot - reminding me of a flock of birds that will huddle around the chimney cap for warmth on a winter day. It was so odd... They all looked as though they were in a trance, no one speaking and every one of them (there were at least a dozen) with a wire coming from his or her ear. Brian and our oldest daughter Cate (13) , were sitting on the sofa together chatting when I entered the room. I gave my husband a quizzical look which was returned by a knowing gaze. You see, our kids don't own iPods or MP3 players. In fact, until this year we didn't own a video game of any description. That's rather late in the game, I assure you. Not that I have anything against these little audio devices other than the fact that they are extremely pricey. They'd make wonderful little tools for the kids to hear audio books or lessons on while driving or sitting outside enjoying the weather.
What saddened me was that these children were missing out on so much fun. They weren't interracting at all with each other. They could have been chatting away about school, music, movies, other kids they know (most attend the same school). They could have been playing board games or having a game of football outside, the way we used to do with our cousins. What will their family reunions be like when they're grown - assuming they bother to plan one? What memories will they have to share with each other? They're so tuned out now, will they ever learn to tune in? To build deep, meaningful relationships with anyone, let alone their own family.
The appalling thing is that their parents simply shrug their shoulders and sigh "What can you do?". Indeed, you are their parents - the power is ALL yours. Go ahead and buy the gadgets for your kids, but do it with wisdom and prudence. YOU control the use. Get your kids outside, organize a game of some kind, start a conversation with them. It's a parent's responsibility. But it's so much easier to have them plug in and leave us alone to do what we want to do - uninterrupted...
posted by Nissa at 7:58 AM
1 Comments:
Excellent post! I am amazed.
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